View From A Far
The other day I went to a Beth Moore bible study. Some may not know what or who she is, well I still don’t so don’t worry about it.
Anyway, we came to a point where she was talking about Sadness and Grief. OH Brother I thought. This is the last thing I want to hear, but it was a good thing as it turned out.
I sat there and listened as others verbalized their thoughts on sadness and grief, and for the most part their thoughts on sadness were really good. However, grief was a different story.
For some odd reason people believe that you get “over” the death. OK, I’ll give in and say maybe some people do “get over” a death of a spouse. But I’d love to hear the person say they’d get over the death of their child. Now that got your attention didn’t it?
Personally I just don’t believe people really and truly get over the death of their spouse, well there could be some circumstances where this does happen. There could be a marriage not made in heaven where it’s difficult to want to be there. A spouse is mean, has anger issues, and unkind to his/her spouse and children. Ok, that might be a situation where the surviving spouse might get over it. But for me that was so not the situation, and I believe that’s the situation for many widows.
What was disturbing to me about the subject was how others viewed grief. Everyone there, well not everyone but enough to give me pause, think it’s just a part of the process that you go through to “get over” someone after they die. None of them have experienced death like I have, and that’s a good thing. They believe that grief is just something that will leave you after a specific amount of time. Unfortunately I was the one to tell them that’s not the case. Grief doesn’t leave you (for most people) after a certain amount of time. There’s a part of your heart that will grieve that loss forever. It won’t be debilitating grief, but it will be there.
I’m not saying this to alarm you or to worry you. I’m saying this to bring to light that grief most likely will never fully leave you, it becomes a part of you. However, it is up to you if you choose to live a life worth living or be swallowed up in grief.